Sadness doesn’t make you weak.

Every. Single. Thing reminds me of Jay. Almost literally. At a time of year that seems to be the most sentimental to everyone, I’m having a difficult time. I feel his absence in abundance. I can’t shake the feeling of missing him. I mean, I will always miss him but this is like a constant wave of sadness that won’t let me get to the surface for a breath. I function still. I’m not sobbing uncontrollably or anything. I just think of him 24/7. I never thought losing someone would be THIS hard. I’ve always been the “strong” person. Letting myself feel weakened by emotion is something I’m learning to embrace. It means I loved. I’ve learned to talk about my feelings, I’ve learned to reach out and I’ve learned how to encourage others to do the same. We are all in our own phases of grief. We all grieve in different ways. No one’s sadness is any less important than the sadness I feel. I’ve had people apologize to me for them expressing their grief saying ” if I feel like this i can only imagine what you’re going through”. The truth is… We are all entitled to be sad. If you’re having a bad day and I offer some TLC or try to console you, let me. Don’t down play your own emotions because “I should be more sad than you.” The fact that you’re hurting because of the loss of Jay means that he was loved. He IS loved. This is truly all he wanted in his life, love and acceptance. Don’t feel like being sad makes you any less strong than you are. Sadness is not a weakness. Crying doesn’t make you a baby. Grief is one hell of a thing. The fact that we survive it is astounding.